Bungee jumping is an amazing sport.
After getting harnessed up and tied into the rope, the jump master will tell
you to get on “the platform.” The platform is about 4 square feet (2ft by 2ft).
It’s tiny. There’s only two things you can do from the platform (three things
if you count peeing your pants): stand there, and jump. Once you’re on the
platform you look straight ahead the jump master counts down “3, 2, 1, JUMP!”
And then you bend your knees and fly! In my experience, it’s best to just jump
when you’re told to jump. Don’t psych yourself out and don’t second guess it,
just go.
As I write this, I am sitting on the
brink of a major change in my life. It’s 1am on Dec 30th, 2012 and later
today, there will be a commissioning service in which my wife and I will be
sent off by our church. Monday morning, we leave for La Grande, Oregon where everything
I know is about to change. I won’t be near my family or friends, I’m switching
churches, and I’ll be starting an entirely new job. Life is about to become
very different for me. Inside my heart, anxious dread mingles with nervous
excitement. I kind of feel like I’m on the platform and it’s about time to
jump. I’m looking forward to everything that this change will bring. Olivia and
I will make many new friends, discover new interests, and have more time as a
family. On the other hand, I’m starting to finally appreciate the closeness and
security my life in Portland has brought me. I’m going to miss my family, I’m
going to miss my church, and I’m going to miss my friends. There’s so much
ahead, but there’s also so much behind. I’m excited, but I’m also scared. I
think we all feel this way, at least a little, when we’re on the edge of
change.
When the Israelites were on the
brink, they were scared too. They didn’t trust God to lead them out of Egypt
(Exodus 5:20-21). When he did, he led them straight to the edge of the Red Sea,
where they didn’t trust him again (Exodus 14:10-12). Over and over God brings
the Israelites to the brink, where their only job is to trust him, and they
don’t. When it was time for the Israelites to enter the Promised Land, 12 spies
were sent in. When they returned, only 2 were brave enough to believe God’s
promise. The other 10 spread chaos and created havoc. They were scared.
When God brings us to the brink, we
get scared. It’s not just the Israelites, it’s all of us. It seems that we
always prefer where we’ve been to where he’s taking us (even if where we’ve
been is bad). For Olivia and me, it’d be safe to stay in Portland. It’d be
comfortable to stay with friends, family, and our church. The struggle for us
is that we want to stay with what we know; it’s safe. But God has seen it fit
to bring us to the brink. He’s decided that it’s time for us to move. It’s time
for some change. He’s put us on the platform and started counting. We’ve
decided to jump because where God is taking us is where we want to be, even if
it’s scary. This is how God grows people; on the brink.
